The REAL Way They Sort Kids into School Classes

School bus

Image by Marylise Doctrinal via Flickr

My kids never believe me.

Just this morning, my fifth-grader asked me how they sort kids into different classes. I said, “They have this big huge aluminum funnel, like the size of a school bus, and they spin it around really fast so that when they drop the kids into it, they get flung out against the side and then slide down. And a little ways down, there’s a hole, not a big hole, just big enough to let the smallest kids pop through. Those kids land in a basket down beneath, and they’re the first-graders.

“The rest of the kids slide on down to the next hole, which is a little bigger, and the kids that pop through that hole, well, they’re the second-graders. And so on.”

He didn’t buy it. Even when I asked, “If that’s not how they do it, then why is it that all the kids in each class are about the same size?”

I’m telling you, the schools must be doing something wrong to make my kids have so little faith in what I tell them.